Story Analysis: The Walk

This year marks the 5th anniversary of the publishing of Danger Dreams (under the pen name of Willie McRae), and I have not read the stories since then. In the coming months, before the official birthday of the book, I will be reading each story and sharing something in-between an analysis, review and post-mortem. I will be kicking off this series with an analysis on the story “The Walk.”

Here it is in wordcloud form.

Overview

This story follows a ninety year old man as he goes for a walk. He leaves his house and observes the modern world around him. He is at peace and yet focused and committed to action. He still has a few tricks up his sleeve and he is able to negotiate some of the bureaucracy he encounters and achieve his mission.

What I like

This was a pretty easy story to write, and I enjoyed thinking about what my own life might feel like if I reach these advanced years. I think there is enough tension in the story to generate and sustain interest, and the characters are pretty likeable.

The theme is heavy, but I think I did a reasonable job of bringing levity to the situation.

I read something where the dialogue was shared with a “-“ instead of quotes like this:

- Character says something

- Other character says something

I must of liked it, so I copied this style, I think it’s the only story in the book which does this. I don’t mind it, it seems to make things a little more dream-like and less literal.

What I don’t like

I suspect this one might be a bit too short, perhaps assuming too many things on the part of the reader. Also, sensory details are scant, the locations don’t really pop. In short, it fits well into my imagination, but I think I could do better to bring the world and context to life for readers who do not already know me. 

The scene with the tour guide and the guest is a little clumsy - it’s a well-meaning interaction and serves an important part of the story, but feels a little rushed after my recent reading.

Score

I give this one a 4/5 relative to other stories in collection, and a 3/5 in terms of what I think I could do now.

Danger Dreams is available through BookBaby and many other online retailers.